No, it's not the name of another masterpiece by one of literature's most celebrated playwrights. Our post today is about poor use of English around the world in situations where someone could have taken the time to check first... but didn't.
Although our point is not really to make fun of the use - the examples do that quite well on their own - we do want English Users to think about the importance of checking what they print, publish or send out in the language of old William.
Let's start with this one. It says " Help Oneself Terminating Machine". Not really, right? So let's look at it in Shakespearean terms.
The Obvious: It's a machine used for withdrawing money from your account.
The Comedy: It sounds like it's some kind of machine where you can "terminate" (kill) yourself without the help of anyone else. Convenient, but slightly tragic.
The Drama: Whoever had this done works in the banking business and could effortlessly have checked how these machines are called in English-speaking countries. Instead, they assumed that English or any other language is based on their own in a word for word, character for character symmetry. It will be dramatic when somebody informs those responsible for this avoidable mistake because there are probably hundreds of machines like it out there with the same "terminal" message.
The Solution: ATM or "Automatic Teller Machine" (most common). Or "Cash Point" or "Cash Machine"
Next, we have this lovely red sign.
The Obvious: Somebody makes cakes for a lot of situations.
The Comedy: Poor use of the apostrophe followed by "s" that makes it sound like the cakes are the possessive property of the Wedding, the Birthday, the Anniversary or the Christening.
The Drama: Unlike the example before, this one is probably from an English Speaking country, so this person has very little excuse. In any case, before sending graphic material out to print it is highly recommended to ask another person to read it for mistakes in spelling, grammar, word choice (diction), and register (level of formality).
The Solution: Cakes for all occasions: Weddings / Birthdays / Anniversaries / Christenings (in other words, use the plural form of the words NOT the possessive)
Here the tragedy becomes darker and more inexcusable.
The Obvious: It's a set of instructions for a media player.
The Comedy: A foreign company can make mistakes, even a small bakery can get it wrong, but if you know which huge IT company made this mistake, it'll put a smile on your face that this manual got through all the different stages and no one spotted the mistake.
The Drama: "Your" is a possessive adjective and does not mean the same as "You're" (you are) - a subject + a verb, which is the right answer. The person here simply used "your" because it is a Homophone (a word that sounds the same), but the real tragedy lies in the dozens of people on staff (all native English speakers) who saw it and did not notice the mistake.
The Solution: "When you're on the road, sometimes you don't have a PC around."
For this last one, we'll let you figure out bad use of English. But we'll give you a hint: it's so tragic, it's funny!
So remember, if you're writing the message, put it through a spell-checker. If you're having it printed, have several people read it first, including someone who is highly proficient in English.
And remember, English is not based on your language and vice versa.
Now imagine if William Shakespeare were alive today. What would he think of all this? Would he spot the comedy and drama in these
examples and write a great play about it?
Probably.
Saturday, March 31, 2012
Wednesday, February 29, 2012
What's so FUNNY, Billy Crystal?
One of the things that makes watching the Oscars in another language an unfortunate experience is that all the jokes that the host makes are translated to the point where they make no sense or as the title of a wonderful movie that dealt with such situations, the message gets Lost in Translation.
At this year's 84th Academy Awards, Billy Crystal - who had hosted the show 8 times in the past - made a lot of jokes. But I bet around the world a lot of people were wondering, "What's so funny, Billy Crystal?"
So for this post, we're providing Mr. Crystal's opening monologue with the transcript and highlighting the punchline (funny end or remark) of each joke and an explanation in blue.
At this year's 84th Academy Awards, Billy Crystal - who had hosted the show 8 times in the past - made a lot of jokes. But I bet around the world a lot of people were wondering, "What's so funny, Billy Crystal?"
So for this post, we're providing Mr. Crystal's opening monologue with the transcript and highlighting the punchline (funny end or remark) of each joke and an explanation in blue.
Thank you, thank you. That was extremely loud and incredibly close. Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close -- that’s how my relatives are watching this show (he's making fun of his family with the title of a nominated movie). This is my ninth time, ninth time hosting the Oscars. So tonight just call me War Horse (another nominated movie).
We’re here at the beautiful Chapter 11 theater (Chapter 11 is not the name of the theater, but a technical term used to describe bankruptcy; the real theater is called the Kodak Theater, the famous company that recently declared bankruptcy) to celebrate a Hollywood tradition that not only creates memories for the ages but also breeds resentment that lasts a lifetime (obviously describing the feelings of those who don't win, perhaps with a little exaggeration... or not) . We’re part of a great industry, a great industry. Movies have always been able to provide entertainment whenever we need a place to get away from it all.
It’s like that great speech that James Earl Jones (a famous actor) made in Field of Dreams (a famous movie about baseball co-starring James Earl Jones. Mr. Crystal imitates the way this actor said the word "baseball" perfectly, many times. Mr. Jones has one of the most recognizable voices in movie history: Darth Vader, The Lion King and many others had his powerful and commanding voice ). It’s that great speech when he talked about baseball. He said in that movie that baseball has always been there during good times and hard times, and just as people turn to baseball, the movies have always been there for us. They’re the place to go to laugh, to cry, to question, to text (referring to the more current habit of people using cell phones to send text messages from the movie theater). So tonight, enjoy yourselves because nothing can take the sting of the world’s economic problems like watching millionaires present each other with golden statues (sarcastic way to look at the Oscars, in view of the world's difficult economy and the fact that Hollywood millionaires are probably not seeing the worse part of it).
So English Users, we hope that you got it and that - whether you found it funny or not - at least understood why at least for many at the 84th Academy Awards, Billy Crystal was funny.
By the way, the Song "Man or a Muppet" from the movie The Muppets that we posted last month, was the winner of an Academy Award for Best Original Song at the 84th Academy Awards. How did we know? We didn't. ;-)
By the way, the Song "Man or a Muppet" from the movie The Muppets that we posted last month, was the winner of an Academy Award for Best Original Song at the 84th Academy Awards. How did we know? We didn't. ;-)
Tuesday, January 31, 2012
DIFFICULT QUESTIONS: Am I a MAN or am I a MUPPET?
For those born less than 20 years ago, this question might not only seem difficult, it might prove impossible. On the other hand, for everybody else, it might make a little more sense.
Either way, here is the main Music Video from The Muppets movie recently released, sung and acted by Jason Segel and his muppet brother.
As you will see, it's not only fun, but provides three interesting language points:
Enjoy!
Lyrics:
Either way, here is the main Music Video from The Muppets movie recently released, sung and acted by Jason Segel and his muppet brother.
As you will see, it's not only fun, but provides three interesting language points:
- Asking questions about yourself (Am I... ?)
- Wondering about "possible" situations with the ever-popular First Type of conditional in the form of an If - then statement.
- Using a noun as an adjective: a hell of a day, the beauty of it all, a muppet of a man
Enjoy!
Lyrics:
I reflect on my reflection
And I ask myself the question
What's the right direction
to go
I don't know
Am I a man?
or am I a muppet?
(Am I a muppet?)
If I'm a muppet
then I'm a very manly muppet
(Very manly muppet)
Am I a muppet?
(Muppet)
Or am I a man?
(Am I a man?)
If I'm a man that makes me a muppet of a man
(A muppet of a man)
I look into these eyes
And I don't recognize
The one I see inside
It's time for me to decide
Am I a man?
Or am I a muppet?
(Am I a muppet?)
If I'm a muppet
well I'm a very manly muppet
(Very manly muppet)
Am I a muppet?
(Muppet)
Or am I a man?
(Am I a man?)
If I'm a man that makes me a muppet of a man
(A muppet of a man)
Here I go again
I'm always running out of time
I think I've made up my mind
Now I understand who I am
I'm a man
I'm a muppet
I'm a muppet of a man
I'm a very manly muppet
I'm a muppet-y man
That's what I am
Labels:
CONDITIONALS,
MAKING QUESTIONS,
POP CULTURE,
THE MUPPETS
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